autumn. it is by far my favorite season. it makes me think of happy times. football games. coffee. friends. family. so many things that i love. even love itself. i miss american fall because it is so crisp and colorful. being in paris this past weekend made me yearn for an american autumn. paris is so beautiful i'm so glad that i got to go, i just wish i was able to spend more time there but i'm going back in may with lauren so it should be amazing. my parents were gone this weekend, i had to do laundry all morning. and my no good 16 year old brother won't help. he was out last night while i was sitting on the couch, with a box of tissues, a movie i'd seen, my bunny and blankets dosing off from my nyquil. how lame was i? a senior in high school home on a saturday night alone. but honestly, i don't think that it is that lame. i enjoy time by myself. even though it should be spent working on school work (bleh) or college applications(save me) i like to just have time to myself. this morning i woke up and started putzing around the house, doing laundry having some tea watching grey's anatomy. and i don't mind one bit. i don't mind being home, not on the phone, not on the computer, and not having to answer to anyone. it is quite nice. but i must say i was disappointed to come home to an empty house last night, i wished that my parents would have been here but i guess i have to deal. this weekend in paris was not that spectacular. besides being in france, my favorite country second to america, i was bored. volleyball is a snooze. my houser buddy is a snooze, and the bus ride was hell. who wants to be on a bus for 8 hours with a bunch of people that i'm not really friends with? not i. i know my parents are always telling me that i have to learn how to get along with others blah blah blah. but i really don't give a shit. i'm nice to everyone, well i usually am, but why am i going to be friends with people that i don't enjoy spending time with? why am i going to talk to someone that makes me want to rip out my hair, or watch two freshman girls sit there smile at me when they know i'm not going to smile back. don't get me wrong, i'm not a mean person. i just know what i like and what i want. so why should i be forced to succumb to standards and people that i just don't enjoy. some people perceive me as this hanus bitch ( i just watched 1o things i hate about you) but i don't know why. when i'm walking down the hals at school i don't always have a huge smile on my face. so some 13 year old big boobed, braceface, dick sucking freshman thinks i give her dirty looks in the hall way? do i give a shit no not really. i'm not friends with them am i, i don't need to win their affection for anything. it is quite annoying. i'm a senior they should be kissing my feet, which most of them do :) god this blogging is amazing i feel so stress free after wards.
i unfortunately still have homework to do today for my bitch ass ap human geography teacher. she gives us this stuff to read that doesn't even go along with the book. why do i care which country is the happiest i just want to get a 5 on the AP exam and maybe get some college credit. so stupid. and i have to rewrite an essay which i could care less about its english 12. and i have college essays/applications to do AHHHHHH! someone pinch me please. i'm not trying to be stressed out i'm really trying to take it every day at a time. but when i look at this next week i have so much coming up. 2 quizzes tomorrow, an essay due tuesday, three days in texel for damn science. SAT on saturday (lord help me) and studying/making up work i missed wednesday, thursday, and friday. i need some help. and i know that the Lord is the only one who can help me so i need to listen to what he has to say and not freak out. ay yi yi. well i should probably get back to work. its been nice venting.
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